In 2013 I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis.
Depression and anxiety was already consuming my mind and i’ll be honest with this new diagnosis, I thought my life was pretty much over.
For 3 years I had the symptoms of extreme abdominal pain, blood in stool, lack of appetite and fatigue.
I refused to go to see my GP due to sheer embarrassment and fear.
Looking back I was stupid to leave this untreated for such a long time due to the lasting damage it has caused.
I’ve had a few major and many minor flare ups over the years lasting weeks to months of running from the bedroom to the bathroom.
The worst thing wasn’t only the physical pain and exhaustion it was my mental health.
Spending days and weeks inside four walls pumped full of steroids and heavy painkillers sent me literally crazy.
The main triggers for a flare up is stress, anxiety and certain foods.
Figuring these out has been very helpful to keeping healthy.
What gave me the drive to get better was the people supporting me and my love for nature.
I found out there’s so many other people just like me and a huge community within Crohn’s and Colitis UK.
There was one person in particular who is James Conlon that engaged in conversation with me about C&C UK via Facebook. James connected me within that community and he reassured me that I was not alone.
Reading people’s stories on various forums and groups really helped me understand my diagnosis and the main triggers for the flare ups.
I started looking at things differently to grasp any sort of hope, happiness and inspiration.
Being unwell and housebound for weeks at a time made me really appreciate the world outside. I started to then see everything around me in a different light.
This led to me taking photos on my phone of nature and the sun at the beginning and end of the day.
Sometimes I put these photos up on Facebook and Instagram. My friends and family really encouraged me to take more photos and this gave me confidence.
Photography eventually became an excuse to get outside and explore.
In 2017 I bought my first camera (a Canon 750D) after deciding that my phone wasn’t giving me the quality I craved. Then a year after that I got my dream camera, a Canon 5D mk4.
Learning photography in the beginning was tough because I set such a high standard for myself and I wasn’t getting the results I envisioned.
I craved more. I wanted more. So I persevered.
I surrounded myself with great photographers and film makers. To name a few Arran Witheford, Jack Fairey, Angela Hughes and Spencer Mulholland. These people encouraged me to shoot and were there from the start of my photography journey to answer any questions I had, thank you so much.
Ulcerative Colitis does get in the way of some of my plans.
There has been weeks and months at a time where I have been unable to leave the house due to a flare up.
Also a few occasions of near misses and rushing to the nearest toilet whilst out photographing.
Luckily when out photographing the sunrise, I’m with friends and can keep my gear with them!
The past few years I’ve come to accept having Ulcerative Colitis.
I’ve been very open to talking about it to raise awareness and to reduce any embarrassment people may feel.
Don’t avoid any symptoms you may have and see your GP.
Self care is extremely important.
Reconnect with nature and do what you love. 💜
